Slight Addiction

Warm Welcome

2011-04-20T20:50:00.000-07:00

Hello. It's been 3 to 4 times sinse I've kicked cigarettes since I've been on here. That's a long time. On a whim, and a whole lot of personal drama and realization and such (insert long and painfully, heart wrenching drama here, though most of it's spiced for television) I've decided to post again. Starting tonight. With this post. So here it is. Tomorrow, I'm gonna post a poem I've been working on. Then we'll see how it goes. Hello again internet. Que pasa?

For Lack of a Better Excuse

2010-05-26T15:18:00.000-07:00

As implied, I honestly wish that I had a better reason to be posting right now, but, Im sitting in a school comp.lab after school waiting for a ride. Alls well that ends well. The point being I guess I should mange a better blog? I got a comment from a follower like a month or more ago, found out about it today. Ha... haha... ha... nervous, don't blame me yet laughter. Well, I guess now that life has gone back to confusing but hopeful, I have more to post about? I've done alot of journal ranting, so why not include those? A few basic updates before I get back into this full fledged (probably spelled that wrong), I plan on moving out over the summer, I'm failing Sophmore year, and I still need to learn to drive. But I'm gonna do it when I move out, and get a job. With (not so great) appartments, comes (maybe too?) great responsibility. So, all is updated, and thou shalt be back for more mindless yondering in a bit. Cheer's mates. And thanks for that comment by the way. It's actually very encouraging that one person on an internet of billions and more will take time to say something about you spilling your not that horrible but made out to be monsterous life. Honestly though, life's not that bad. But thanks again.

Hopefully not lacking,
Corey Jones (Charlie Foxtrot)

Once thought daily to weekly and now struggling monthly song suggestion(s):
End of the World :: Armor for Sleep
The Good Life :: Three Days Grace
I Bet That You Look Good On The Dance Floor :: Artic Monkeys

2010-04-28T20:04:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone. Haven't posted in a while, so thought I might kinda drop in and say hola. I write a lot in my journal, rant alot to myself when I'm really bored or stressed, so I might post one of those today, but the point is, wazzzzzzuuuuuuuuppppp?!?! I know a blog is supposed to be daily or weekly (we're bordering monthly, captain!) but a lot goes on when your a sarcastic teen with a motivational problem and a tendency to challenge all aspects of social, personal, and mental life. Actually, a lot of home drama, and a new term I'm struggling to grasp, "grow up". I know, fascinating, yes? Whose ever heard that one before. Point being I just haven't been post... ish? That works. So I'll post again. I'll also update your song list with some good stuff and decide on something to rave on tonight, and if worse comes to worse, I'll talk about some random things I noticed in this past month. Wow, adulthood? I know, now I'm just talkin crazy. It's coming fast though. Wish me luck eh? Will be back later, and til then, adios.

Song Suggestions (Holy hell a new title?!?)
Holding On :: Scary Kids Scaring Kids
The World As We Know It :: Scary Kids Scaring Kids
Odd One :: Sick Puppies
Stone Cold Crazy :: Metallica (or Queen, depending your musical preference)

Tequila On The Beach, It's Quite Salty When We Kiss

2010-04-17T22:09:00.000-07:00

Hey all. Sorry, been a tad busy very recently. Went back to home town of greatness for about two weeks, got back like a week ago. Went to school the Friday after I got back, after a week of slack, picked up all my work, and slept through 20 minutes of geometry. Then got home, stuff happened, all in all, I'm kinda.... um, in the immortal words of a little sister, "bleh" right now. And nostalgic. Made me want to post though. And so I did. Woo! Post-ish.. anyway, gotta update you wit some new muziq, so will do that, at least six songs to make up for the slack. Fucktacular.

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
1985 :: Bowling for Soup
Lay Me Down :: The Dirty Heads
Self Esteem :: Offspring
Spare Me The Details :: Offspring
Woah Oh! (Me VS Everyone) :: Forever the Sickest Kids
Renagade :: Hed PE

Hidden Bonus Tracks!!!!
I Almost Told You That I Love You :: Papa Roach
Monster :: Skillet
Capital H :: Motion City Soundtrack
Die Mother Fucker Die :: Dope

Insertion of Grr's and Grins

2010-03-13T00:33:00.000-08:00

Well ok, what do I do with most my blogs? Complain. About the generation above us and the one we're raising, and rarely ours itself. Today is different. Today I embrace the screwed up and psychologically damaged generation I stand with, accompanied by the most respectable, loyal, and best friends I could hope for. Tonight I embrace the wanna-be vampirism of two people with deep issues, I embrace the occasional Grr tossed out by the people who named themselves after trivial animals, and the I embrace the nights of coffee induced thought and hours on end of just listening to music. And changing tires at midnight. Actually 1:13 AM. To that all I raise my glass (or maybe mug?) and say cheers. Fuck yes.

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Savior :: Rise Against

Breaking the (serious and somewhat dull anit-people-in-higher-positions rant) Habit

2010-03-06T14:23:00.001-08:00

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Meant to Live :: Switchfoot

Oh by the gods, today you get two!!!!
City :: Hollywood Undead

$afety in Number$

2010-03-06T13:30:00.000-08:00

They say there's a price of safety. It's been around a long time. Obey the law, police protect you. Obey the bible, the lord will save you. Back when an eye for an eye was incorporated as law, do what you were told, and you were avenged. So, as history (most likely) always repeats itself, some one is bound to take advantage of something as major. It's been done in policing (is that a word? maybe copping? law avenging?) many times, and quite a few in religion as well. Do what I tell you, and you'll be fine. Only this time it's not a 2 bit (or 8-bit![Mario the Bandito!]) criminal posing as a peace keeper or preacher. It's someone worse. Corporation. Corporation may not run off with your grandma's purse, but corporation knows a better technique. Selling safety.

*camera pans out on a run down, dead beat Sesame Street, where Grover lies passed out on the street and the cookie monster is laying out lines*
Mr. Crack Addict Cookie Monster: OM NOM NOM, COCAINE!
The Count with a Cheep Toupee: 1, 2, 3! 3 lines of crack cocaine! Ah ah ah ah.
Elmo with a fur coat and grill: This way hoe! How'd ja like ta tickle me elmo, eh?
Hoe: This ain't what you pay me for elmo!
Elmo with fur coat and grill: Shut up hoe!
(Elmo reaches up to slap her, as a drucken big bird staggers on screen)
The Count with a Cheep Toupee: 1! 1 crazy drunken bird! Ah ah ah ah.
Staggering, Slurring Bird: Shuddap Count Shuckula!
(He cracks a bottle over the Counts head, knocking off his toupee)
(A seemingly famous celebrity or athlete steps on screen, giving this ad the illusion that this celebrity cares for this cause, so the commercial cannot be a load of it, and that you should also care with all your heart and throw money at this cause because this glamorous celebrity does)
John Travolta: Hey hey, what's goen on here?
Elmo with fur coat and grill: Beat it greaser, you aint welcome here in da hood no mo!
John Travolta: Hm, well maybe if Sesame Street had purchased more Home Security, Home Insurance, and Life Insurance, it might be A-okay, right fellas?
(Elmo's hoe starts coughing)
John Travolta: Sounds like a nasty cough there, eh fellas? I think maybe some Tylenol might help out there.

Now, Sesame Street seems pretty scary doesn't it? But as our pal John Travolta mentioned, it might not have gone to hell without life insurance!

What a load.

Commercial's usually aren't as blunt and uncreative as that, but the idea's the same. Buy our product, and safety is all yours. Safety may not have always been a human right. Before civilization it was fend for yourselves. Hunt with your village or hunt by yourself, either way there was never a rest-easy assurance you would come home safe. But that doesn't necessarily mean that anyone has to charge a lot of money while pressuring you into buying it by showing you a horrible outcome that's unlikely but your fragile and easily molded mind is convinced into believing. And while it's not as extreme as it could be, it's still enough to make me write it down on the internet, still henceforth still as useless as I was on the subject from the start. But Rome wasn't built over night. For me it might be half built before I scrap it to make way for a new amusement park. Either way, metaphors aside, the old saying still holds true. There's always safety in numbers. The only question is what number are you willing to pay for it.

Mindless Rant (Not a conpriracy theory! Thats silly...)

2010-03-06T12:56:00.000-08:00

Before I mindlessly and probably misinformedly start ranting, let me just comment. NOT A GOVERNMENT CONSPIRACY. Ok. That's better. I think the government here is already pretty messed up, but I'm not going to bust out the "AND YOU KNOW THEY HAVE UFOs!" out on you. I just notice that for everything good, there is a necessary evil. I also notice that today that evil is control. (gasp, here it comes!) The Government (Oh god he said it!) can package the things we as a highly advanced and somehow still stupid country see necessary to combat this evil, and use it to keep us in line. I just don't understand how people fall for it so easily. Drugs, alcohol, and fire arms, oh my! These are all things we have learned to fear as society, or embrace, depending on other mind numbing rant topics. Either way, its convenient that when ever these things are at their scariest, the government can swoop right in with its mighty cape and skin tight suit and say "Ok, you're all safe now. I ask for nothing but you eternal debt." These things really aren't that scary, its the people behind them. A gun doesn't pull its own trigger, and in some situations, it can save your life. Yet we're taught that guns are great beings of ultimate evil, and to own a gun is to be a criminal. The more we think the world is a scary place, the more sheltered the government can keep us. And that doesn't bug me so much. I won't ever know the difference unless we rebel. The only reason I care is because it turns us into closed-minded paranoid schitzophrenics who can't accept anything but the normal. We're afraid of new technology in other countries. Because of course Nintendo's new game console doubles as a bomb. Anything out of normal American context is shunned. And that sucks. There's a lot we can come to learn and share and embrace from other places, ideas and plans, music and culture. But everyday it seems more like we prefer it here on our lonesome and most people you ask about other culture act like its a piece of paper with a 3 scribbles on it with the words my family on top. "Oh I like how the scribble that says daddy is blue. Now lets put that right here on the fridge, that way when you're older and agree with me on the monstrosity of it, we can just throw it away!" Well, I have grown up. And I'm not 3. And I still don't understand why some people think my PS3 is going to detonate after the right button combination.

Copy, Paste. Repeat.

2010-02-28T18:45:00.000-08:00

Ok, so what am I doing? Im staring off into space, and well, typing. This might not be that super happy thing I promised earlyer, thats later. But this isnt dark. Just informational. Hm... does anyone else have a sub-conscience guide that takes form as an irritating song heard earlyer in the day? Whenever I do deep thinking, it seems like, in the backround of my mind (Holds 20 comfortably) or in the breaks between cars on the thought engine (chuga chuga woo woo), theres a song, one I don't 100% like but at the same time don't mind, plays loud. Like it has input on my thoughts. Suggestions, more like clues, that yu have to figure out. Yu know, like my head is playing head games with me. Few times have I ever tied the song to the situation, but mostly, its like a shooting star. The rare moments it happens, yu were to intrigued by it to consider making a wish (or unraveling the clue). Anyway, well, yea, I was just curious if that happens to anyone else, ya know? So there it is, out in the open... who will make the first move. We'll find out after this comercial break. I think thats spelled wrong.

Two Halves (of a whole)

2010-02-28T17:53:00.001-08:00

People think they know what life really is. Like theres a set deffinition on love, happyness, life, survival, the things we do from day to day life. But why? For me, maybe just me, its blurred. Love? Im not sure. I never will be. Happyness, thats easy, its just a mystery because we hate ourselves for taking happyness from the wrong things. The things that make me happy are simple, stupid things, unimportant things, but in the views of most, Im just irresponsible. "Grow up". Sure. As soon as I know how. Today and yesterday, they were some of the best times I've had, just because of a few people. But they made me realize, no matter how happy we are, theres always a piece of us that wants more. Which ties into survival. The things we want are not the things we get. We try for some of them, but others are not something we should want. Which is wat causes us to try anyway. That sense of forbiddeness makes it taste better. Eves apple. Yu cant survive knowing yu wont get it, yu cant survive if yu do. On account of the guilt and peer hatred. Sorry this was pretty dark. On a lighter note, I'll post something happy later. Glad to see yu look forward to it... aw, look at that smile!

Congratulations! (insert studio cheering)

2010-02-28T17:49:00.000-08:00

Congratz to one of my followers (Black Rabbit) on 200 views.

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Pretty Rave Girl :: I am X-ray
Pretty Rave Girl :: n!TRO (remix)

Post Conversational Boredem

2010-02-27T15:23:00.000-08:00

It means I'm bored having stopped conversationing with people. If that's spelled right. Anyway. Yesterday, I walked around for the longest time sense I can remember. Like walking all day. And all in the rain. Splashing, stealing oranges from low hanging trees (Neighborhoods Most Wanted), and just plain talking. Aside from the ending, really good fucken day. Just thought I'd let my adoring fans know. This better not show up in Time. Thats the name, right?

Is that Jazz I hear? (actually no)

2010-02-27T15:21:00.000-08:00

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Ain't no sunshine :: Al Green

Just Ranting

2010-02-27T15:08:00.000-08:00

Havn't posted in a while, which I addressed in the last post. But now I probably should for reasons unknown. Ok... something serious. Driving in a jeep after running for 3 blocks with a 75% full cup of coffee is not as bad as this sentence makes it seem. Although running like that and trying not to wear your coffee should be a warm-up Olympic event. But anyway, it usually takes a strange combination of things or ideas to make us think to deeply about things, right? Unless yu have a little ADD. I do. But thats not really why I did. I did because I was sitting in back drinking sickly sweet coffee balancing it out with the breeze from the window. It was cool. But it made me think that pretty soon I'll be grown. Im 17 in... 12 or 13 days, sorry coffee and Slipknot are not good for caring to count. Either way soon. I'll be grown. At college or work. When will I have one of those stupid moments of dull enjoyment again? Life charges at us quickly, and well I have a few years before I should concern, but at the same time, its just a creepy though. So yea, thats my share for today. Sorry, I'll be more caring for the tranquil respect of The Blogging later. but yea, theres the ideas in my mind. Hope you enjoyed the presentation. Flyers and refreshments in the lobby.

The Week Time Forgot

2010-02-23T22:33:00.000-08:00

No but um yea sorry. Completely forgot to post anything for like a week. Hence the title. Anyway I was back in my town for a week. That one town I mentioned before, that little like pinprick on the dart bored map of California. Columbus or whomever took out a map and a dagger and blindly stabbed it. Put a town here with a 2 by 3 mile radius. Only it was already settled. By like a 90 to 7 to 3 percentage ratio. Mexican, white, black. So its like a little Spanish farming community except for the fact that its a town with a corn nut factory, 15 gas stations, and almost too many little convinient stores. If thats spelled right. Anyway, I have alot to uselessly talk about as if Im different in anyway from the so many people sending this world to hell cuz I have ideas. Im different for realizing that I have ideas, but Im probly screwin the world over just as badly. Anyway that was kinda mellow dramatic. But its late and Im feeling weird and I miss my cute witch so instead I'll rant tomorrow. So see yu then. I promise. Yes. No, seriously. Don't give me that look. Yea. Yea-huh. Ok, til then. Night night.

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
ToyBoy :: Stuck in the Sound

Wearing Sunglasses Indoors

2010-02-15T16:04:00.000-08:00

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
My Favorite Accident :: Motion City Soundtrack

So stop me if yu've heard this one, but..

2010-02-14T19:43:00.000-08:00

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
About a Girl :: Nirvana

And a shout out (wat is this, radio talk show?) to the cutest witch I know. With much love, Feliz dia de San Valentin.

A Day of Romance (pronouced with an italian accent)

2010-02-13T22:23:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow, or today, or 3 and a half years ago, depending upon when yu read this, is valentines day. We, as most know, are the doom generation, the angsty teens stereo typically angry at everything, hating all and every authority, yet we still demand one day were we can seem like normal people, "mature and grown up", showing a certain love and sense of respect for those we dub worthy in our cliques. I don't mind the holiday much, its just another day morphed into something that earns us all free stuff in some way or another. I just don't understand it. The concept of wanting to make yur longterm, shortterm, or highschoolweekterm love happy for a day is Ok, but why one designated day of the year? If yu really like or love them, wouldnt it be better to do it spontainiously more then a few times throughout a year? As humans (proudly bearing the title "gods mistake" for hundreds of years!)[yes it was meant to sound like a product ad] we tend to act malicious towards most other humans for stupid reasons, so what confuses me the most about the day, is the fact that we can all forget the hate we feel and the horror we feel towards those feeling hate and act like one happy continental family. How come this doesnt work in everyday life?

Crackhead mother: I heard yu fucking failed algebra
Rebellious daughter who hates home life: Fuck off, as if yu care?!
Famous celebrity (Shaquille O'neal) to ease tension: Hey guys, its valentines. Chill?
Crackhead mother: He's right sweetie.
Rebellious daughter who hates home life: I almost love you mom
Crackhead mother: Me to dear..

It works everywhere else, why not there? If everyone pretended that we weren't just malicious animals with brains and actually cared for more then a handful of the other one's, we might actually do ok. As I saw in some one else's blog, who has a good point, you can't say sorry to and pretend to like a person for a day if they didn't make it to the next one. So why not act like we're better then animals on more then one day? Hell, I know some people have moved passed that point and are of the asshole majority most of the time, but for the rest of us, is it really so hard to be ok to another person a few days a week? And comon, are we so cheap as to go all out on the person we love once a year? And I dont mean buying dinner and chocolattes. I mean, all out, romantic movie, nice place for dinner, maybe even fuzzy cuffs. Trust me, from my standpoint (the opinion of a broke teenage writer failing geomety?!?) it's not that hard. Speaking of which, what would you buy a cute witch? I have a few ideas, but suggestions are fun to read anyway.

Our Own Universe(s)

2010-02-13T21:36:00.000-08:00

We, as in me, my brother, our irritating midget friend, my cool wheelchair uncle, and his wife, went to the river today. We live like a mile or something from the water front if yu were to take a measurement while walking for wat ever reason. No I don't recomend mad genius shinanigens. If that's spelled right. Either way, we were there almost all day. Charlie (the awesome recovering uncle[seriously he's independent]) went fishing, me and Terry (his wife[is that spelled right?]) looked for rocks, and chillaxed with my brother. Then read alittle. And built a bonfire. The point though, as title suggests, is, by show of hands, who has ever experienced the excistance of their own universe? I see.... 45..... 62... yes yu in the front there to... ok. Thanks for cooperation. But we all know how it feels right? If yu dont, yu have to try it. Can be obtained multiple ways. Hypnosis from a cheap guy off the street not recomended. Either way. Its almost the same feeling as the first time yu hit a high or not quite hammer yurself. Like suddenly the world around isnt the same one you were on 5 minutes ago. Here, everythings ok. Everyone, everything, they all agree, everything is just fine. All yu can think is. Fuck. Im... happy. I had a vibe like that for 30 minutes... until my midget friend with (as far as we can guess[pretty surely{I might add}]) ADHD completely smashed any trace I had left. Quickly and mercelessly. Something about a walrus. I won't go into the details in a place as prestine as the internet.

Sweet sweet sounds of the soul

2010-02-12T21:24:00.000-08:00

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
25 Years :: Middle Class Rut

Happily Ever (sometime) After (yesterday)

2010-02-12T20:35:00.000-08:00

We all hope for fairy tale endings. We hope that everything will be fine. And while we're all attacked in the back of our minds by the dull, but blunt fact that it only happens for few, we still hope for it. And why not? We, as the next generation of teens and tweens alike, have everything we want right? Social events and gatherings, always doomed high school relationships for passing time, phones, internet, Tv, sports, (moving on to the secretive teen stuff{SHH!!!]) booze, drugs, sex, and destruction of personal property. Theres nothing that says our long distance relationships, our positions of power at school, our undying devotion to the members of our cliques, will ever end. And yet somehow they do. Things tend to just end, almost suddenly, and then we move into the real world. Not alot changes, though, does it? We still have our phones, our internet and Tvs, games and fake relationships, booze and drugs, but somehow, its all different. "More grownup". I've seen mature adults. I've seen (majority) immature adults. And while this just seems a tail spin of unchanging immaturity from one side of social life to the other, it's still just what we do. Some people will realize their dreams, others will not, but in the end we're usually all just end up as a middle to low class family, being as perfect a family as unspoken law recomends, or completely defying it to be the stereo typical disfunctional family of dramatic sitcoms. Hint hint cough cough CSI: Miam* . Hint hint M***** in the Middle. The lucky ones however. They will be the ones to rule the United States of (assumed perfect) America. CEOs, heads of big business, democrats, republicans, all those with all around senses of power. They won't be that family. And if they have children, they will be raised to be in charge of our, so high above the clouds that the slow demise is invisible. Almost like tyrants. Evil kings. Becoming the thing we once thought and dreamed of destroying while we were still small, playing "Knights" in our back yards/patios/porches/construction sites. If I forgot any, insert them there. And so, we all tip our glasses to the unchanging future and wait for the man made apocalypse.

Not I realize that that was all very self rightious and um doom-ish and all, but Ive been kinda thinkin pretty heavy so um yea, its my mind child. Say hi to the people Maggie.... aw... sorry, shes a tad shy, being a mind child and all.

The Morning There After

2010-02-11T20:06:00.000-08:00

I woke up after falling asleep after coming home after getting off school. I thought it was the next morning. And I didnt want to go to school. Which is no different, see, I never do. But this time... I was cool about it. I accepted it. I felt ok about wasting my life away in a social gathering not meant for wasting life away. I dont get why though. The difference is like (rough estimate[So I'm not that clever{But you all love me anyway...}]) 18 hours worth of unconsciousness. So why was it a big deal? Well, this issue is completely unimportant, but it isn't whiny like most my others. So thats a plus. But its not deep. So we just nuked that plus. I'll be on to post something worthy later. Until then, ta ta's for now.

And another one

2010-02-11T20:05:00.000-08:00

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Around the World :: Red Hot Chili Peppers

Midnight

2010-02-07T00:35:00.001-08:00

Actually its 12:35. Have yu ever been yelled at but apologised to by someone who believes they have another personality? Its really confusing...

Daily/Weekly/Amesome um song thingy

2010-02-05T22:54:00.000-08:00

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Dammit :: Blink 182
(blink never dies{or do they?[well I like 'em..]})

Free

2010-02-05T22:52:00.000-08:00

Have you ever just like wanted to escape from somewhere? Like not like busting outa prison or anything but just... leave, and keep going? I like my home, I like my family, my friends and all, and this city is ok. But I just want to escape. Get a big van, pick up a few friends, and just drive. I know that wouldnt last forever, but hey, nothing does. Besides, do yu realize how many novelty coffee mugs yu can find going cross country?!?

The Men in Blue

2010-02-04T20:50:00.000-08:00

Well he wasnt a cop actually. Actually he was a huge guy in like a running jacket and tshirt. I think jeans? He's the knew security person at our school. He doesnt bother me. Until one of my friends is about ta get beat. He, is, by some, a good friend, but seriously, we live by an unspoken code, right? We fight with and for our friends. We also retreat with them apparently, but thats besides the point, the point being, walking away to somewhere else was in the immortal words of big guy "Just not ok guys." I'm a fair person. So I explain the situation. And he says ok. I Know where your coming from.
............
............
BIG fucken mistake. Has anyone, and I offer unspoken apology, ever said that to you? Especially authoritive figures. Cops, mall cops, rent-a-cops, security guards, teachers, principles, store owners, store clerks, and any others with a false sense of authority? Theres somthing about these people that, given the so called power, makes them the most "understanding" adult who "knows whats best for you." Im sorry but not once in my life have I ever met anyone worthing of wielding both titles in their holster. Its not like I dont respect this guy or anything for having to deal with us "delightful" teenagers, but seriously? Like he's ever been the midget with a temper? Has he ever been the kid who befriended that midget and is about to whitness him be smeared like paste across pavement? The kid who if he threw a punch, wouldnt stop until his fists were bleeding? I dont think so. But who knows. For all I know he was a one armed captain in the titanic who swam to tokyo for rehab and got fat on Okonomyaki and rice balls. The possibilities are endless.

Like I'd Forget

2010-02-03T17:52:00.000-08:00

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Pachuca Sunrise :: Minus the Bear

Right Now

2010-02-03T17:43:00.000-08:00

Ok, so right now I'm listenin to music cuz I was bored and I just like read a manga and it was good and I liked it but it made me think and now I'm thinking why was I thinking but I was and its not that bad but still and I dunno, like still what and yea I dunno, thinkin thinkin thinkin, about to be preoccupied at 7, bow chicka bow wow, but not like bow chicka, just cause a show and I usually miss it and I wont miss it but I mean wat if I do I mean its just a show but still its ok but yea its distracting, distracting to my mind which is like off the leash but thats not so bad but I mean maybe its just like me like do you think its bad I mean do yu there cuz I know theres many who arent therefore what I said doesnt matter but Hi anyway. And I forgot alotta periods.

Back to sanity, seriously Im bored right now. I wanna get my liscense but still on a budget. Why, if america and so productive, ever so advancing, is it such a hassle? Especially to earn a piece of laminated plastic that says yu can operate a hunk of metal that weighs a ton or two. Still, cant complain, lifes pretty chill. Like I havnt actually felt this tranquil ina while. So yea thats cool. What else..... going to Arizona for college? Dunno. Hopefully. Hiroshimachu knows I'm not leavin here for high school, could not defy our "queen". Still, gotta love 'em. Parents right? Right? Man tough crowd. Anyway yea. So yea, plans and stuff. Gotta go now. Laters guyz.

No title Nesessary (or spelled right?)

2010-02-03T17:40:00.001-08:00

Have you ever smiled at something even though yu knew the exact reason why and the exact reason not to?
(Disclaimer: Nobody was insulted in the making of this post)
(Other Disclaimer: Why would they be?)
(PSA: It was an innocent smile!!!!)
(Truthful PSA: Like seriously, just yu know cuz someone and yea)
(Other Type of Broadcast: Should I have ever left?)

What is love, baby dont hurt me, dont hurt me (anymore?)

2010-02-01T21:36:00.000-08:00

Seriously, dont slap me again. Yu know who yu are... pointing fingers in childish so I wont but *cough*YU*cough* sorry, a cold, ya know? Anyway, beside the long pointless intro, I want to know somthing. So if yu have an answer mail it to the adress given with a greyhound ticket. thanks much loyal people on the internet. VIVA LA ARIZONA!!!

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Like A Stone :: Audioslave

The Winds Of Change

2010-02-01T16:44:00.000-08:00

I changed my blog page a tad bit for some reason. Now its looks less depressed pity-me teenager and more.... whatever it is now. The picture is kinda like an add for Fooly Cooly though, but I like the pic, and its a great anime. Either way, til I find a better one, its the one Im usen, but if ya find a better pic or scheme all together, let me know, pretty please with motor oil?

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion: (Yu get TWO!!!)
London Beckoned Songs About Money By Machines :: Panic! at the Disco
Touch, Peel and Stand :: Days of the New

Inspiration

2010-02-01T16:17:00.000-08:00

Did I spell that right? Anyway somones post made me want to offer my opinion on the wonderful world of bookism. In other words, read these homies. Descriptions follow in the links.

Scott Pilgrim Volumes 1-6 :: (I think theres 7 though) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scott_Pilgrim

Deadman Wonderland :: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deadman_Wonderland

Hard Love :: (a favorite) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hard_Love

Razzle :: http://www.buildingrainbows.com/bookreview/reviewid/812

The Ravenmaster's Secret :: http://www.the-trades.com/article.php?id=2008

And the Harry Potter trilogy was pretty good, movies, eh, not so great, but the books were great.

Fullmetal Alchemist, Ef - A fairy tale of two, and the Hirgurashi series are all good and recommended mangas. (mangafox.com or onemanga.com = free reading)

Midnight Wakings

2010-01-31T21:24:00.000-08:00

I woke up like 7 times. I had 7 different dreams last night. All some of then strangest fricken dreams I have ever had. Period.

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
I Hate Everything About You :: 3 Days Grace

Destined from Birth (Personnal Advertisment)

2010-01-30T22:11:00.000-08:00

Ok, so some people are destined from birth (thats the title. clever huh?) to be stupid, and or evil. But not really evil, just annoying, I'm-not-like-you-and-that-makes-you-suck evil. In modern terms, like a bully, but not as steroid induced teenager looking. Either way, it makes you want to fend for yourself, in a subtle, but stylish way, right? I hate these people, you hate (or if yur strongly religious, feminine, or metallic, really dislike) these people, so I have an offer for you. Cue to commercial.

*Camera opens on a busy street, and two groups of teens walking opposite directions, toward each other*
*they lock eyes as they pass, fierce passion for the art of ninja skill in their eyes*
*the teen from the group of three poses a question*
Smoky Teen 1: Hey do you have a cigarette?
*other teen of two teen group faces the group casually, and looks at them*
Blazer-wearing Teen: Not on me..
Smoky Teen 2: Yea, thats cause you're a queer.
*the groups pass each other, tension obviously present*
*three steps after, blazer kid turns quickly, pulling out a YFS Revolver and firing three quick shots*
*camera focuses on the group of three, as they pause, and fall over anime style, slowly and silhouetted*
*the blazer kid walks to their figures, still smoking)
Blazer-wearing Teen: Here's your cigarette.
*he flicks one on their bodys, and walks away, silhouetted by the sunset*
*the group of three stands up dizzily, unaware of the words "Fucken Stupid" now tattooed to their foreheads*

Thanks to our brand new Japanese/Russian design, the YFS Revolver can effectively knock sense into those of choice, while (as if by magic) placing a permanent and worthy title upon them. Sorry, no picture available yet, but use your imaginations, what else are they for?
If you are convinced (Don't lie to me) please send a Greyhound ticket to the following address, and your shipment should arrive in 4-274 Business Days. Thank you, and good night friends.

Seriously though, human race needs facial reconstruction at times. And Pina Colada juice is friggen greatness. Night all.

I Wont Leave YOU!!!!

2010-01-30T22:06:00.000-08:00

Without a song tonight. So taken care of, arnt cha?

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
19-2000 :: Gorillaz
(best virtual band ever, music video is killer if yur on youtube)

Sympathy to all, and to all, sorry mates

2010-01-29T23:55:00.001-08:00

Yea well that last post was kinda serious and sad and various other S words of negativity so I must repent, sorry all, and to all I am sorry. So here's something less serious. For your viewing pleasure, this picture thingy.

Its oh so pleasant right? So warm and fuzzy and makes you want it so much and its like why didn't I ask that one time and then there was that time and then the dance in spring break, Tijuana, 1995... but I'm ahead of myself. Anyway, this is nice, but here's something great/funny/SQUIRREL?!?/enjoyable.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KyRCQp32p8

Note: NOT MINE, BUT FUNNY AS HELL. ALL credit given respectfully to the creator and master of greatness behind the scenes of illwillpress.com.

By A Thread

2010-01-29T23:43:00.000-08:00

Abbreviated it makes BAT. Anyway, to the point, the point being a chemical imbalance or a product of the fear of fitting in, I don't know what my purpose is anymore. I think it was to do something simple but complex and important in undertone. Write a book or a song or something. Not even be famous, just have the achievement locked away in the filing cabinet section of my brain labeled greatness. For some reason, the documents in preparation for this event seems to have been misplaced, and right now, I am, as title implies, hanging from a noose of a thread, not in attempt at suicide or deep poetic meaning or anything, trust me I'm truly not one for psycho-babel or self righteous pity, I just have the notion that I'm hanging above things, observing them. Instead of contemplating things, thinking them through, and thoroughly enjoying most of them, I'm just watching. Like its a bland movie. The actors are all good people. But the plot, the setting, the storyline in general, just not that great. And I've been waiting 60 minutes now for my Dr. Pepper. I'd ask to see a manger but that would be me, and I can't fight with myself without valid reason. Why internally destroy yourself for a fizzy concoction of taste? And so I wait. Viva la resistance!

Exploding (In Private)

2010-01-28T17:58:00.000-08:00

Right now Im loosen it hard really trippen mind speedin like 2574 words a minute here and I dunno why. No substance or contact high, no emotional catalyst, nothing to logically explain the explaining Im explaining to myself in the privacy of the room locked away in my head. All I can say for sure is that I want to go to Japan, meet a brittish girl, fall in love, write a manga, drink a smoothie, fix up our motor bike (will we ever?) and name my future daughter Maggie, then when all is said and done, throw a snowball in hell.

Either way, its strange. Like wow strange. Holy hell whats going on strange. Is that your car in my kitchen driven by a stoned teenage female buddhist munk strange.

But anyways again, I dont know why, but it was kicked off (TOUCHDOWN) by deep though, invoked by Johnny The Homicidal Maniac. Best fucken comic ever. Although I dont read comics. Cept this one. Its greatness. Anyway I recommend it to anyone, but mostly psychos... and people who appreciate dark humor. Them to. But yea read it if ya ever possibly maybe can.

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
I Will Buy You A New Life :: Everclear

2nd 1 2day

2010-01-27T18:55:00.001-08:00

Dont yu feel lucky?!?

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Seven Nation Army :: White Stripes

The Cute Girl Next Door

2010-01-27T18:54:00.000-08:00

Actually, in my chemistry class. She really is though.

Future Expectations

2010-01-27T18:26:00.000-08:00

Today our grades came. So, typical American stereo-teen-type suggests I freak out and call Becky to like, totally, like, tell her like how bad my like, parents, will, like kill me. Unfortunetly (is that spelled wrong?) I 1) Dont have a friend named Becky and 2) Could not care any amount less then what I dont now. My parents, do. As should all. Except for mine. While most other parents strive to convince their children of the benefits of college, and how it will help them all grow up to forfill their dreams of becoming astronauts, engineers, and cowboys, I really dont care. Really. About 88% of the world suffers through life trying to be overachievers, and while only a fraction succeed, I think that the amount of people trying is quite enough without me. While my parents want me to have a "happy, successful life" ("the ones we never had!"), Im just plain happy underachieving, living day by day in discontent made full by music and intellectual thoughts of what would happen if I asked this girl out or snapped finally and hit that kid in Auto with a brass hammer. Apparently the magic of college promises tons of money and a pleasant leave it to beaver lifestyle, and appealing as it sounds, I'm also promised a ton of money and a breakfast club lifestyle by becoming a writer, DJ, musical artist, or motorcycle technological expert (not learned at college). All things, as mentioned, not learned at college. All things I'd rather be doing when and if the man maid apocalypse strikes. All things I have slight experience in, more in the first and less in the last. All things a psychologist/therapist (glad someone knows what my brain is for) will not take as an answer when asked the question why do you have a 2.0 gpa. All things that apparently don't look as much like an American dream as Astronaut, Engineer, or Cowboy. Maybe, if asked politely (over tea and.... crumpets?[fucken love tea{Japanese Tea}]) I might consider the possibility's of striving for so-called perfection. And achieve my long lost dreams of ruling the old west with a horse named Maggie, a girl named Collette, and a revolver called judgment. Giddy up, raw hide.

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Hakuna Stigmata :: Not You Style
(support your local bands, buy a Tshirt)

Stop Motion

2010-01-26T16:55:00.000-08:00

Today my most candid of candid brothers (who by dictionary source isn't candid) showed me a video he saw in his class. The Most Awesomeness and Coolest Way to Waste an Hour Long Period by Showing Greatest Respects Towards Musical Engineering. AKA, Music Appreciation class. Either way, a "grammy" (by the Students for the Stu.... Artists[Sorry, slogan take over]) was given to this video for reasons I dont remember, but I can understand why many possibilities lie.

You will not be disappointed
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_HXUhShhmY

Edited: If you are disappointed please file a complaint to 639 Candyland Lane
Unedited: If you are disappointed, I dont give a fuck.

Back to the mindless pondering. That being that life, as depicted /l\above/l\ is pretty straight
forward, but has so many things tucked away behind the scenes. The people that make it move. So today I pay tribute and sudden sense of respect to those people, be it the people who give us fuel source, fight for the country (no matter how stupid a country we be), producers (of things, not movies), producers (of movies, not music), producers (of music), and the all around people who make life, life.

Merci
(thank you in french)

Sorry, there was no people bashing or pointless paranoia or deep deep thinkin in this post. I promise it tomorrow.

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Her Morning Elegance :: Oren Lavie

Idea Was Stolded

2010-01-26T16:53:00.000-08:00

Pretty self explaining, no? Anyway, coolness
[L*{:
(thats an inside reference face)
(now you know)
[L*{:

2010-01-23T12:57:00.000-08:00

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Spaceship :: Puddle of Mudd

The Price of Faith

2010-01-23T12:43:00.002-08:00

Is about 2 packages of bread products, a few bathroom items like toothbrushes, and a giant cookie with everyones favorite cookie addicted mutant iced on it. Every Saturday, or almost, (the Lord is busy every 3rd one) a few people from a local church come by, bearing gifts of food, sense our little piece of land is a designated ghetto. With a name like Woodland Towers, who'd think it? Either way, they come by full of foods and rants for those of us "less fortunate", or, "fortunate" enough to live here. All they ask in return, is for, (no joke) your undying loyalty and to pledge alligience to the one and only savior and controller of the universe, God. Pretty tiny price for a giant cookie. Maybe. Either way, it gets me thinking. Everytime my aunt, or uncle (they live here now) answer the door, you can't help but feel guilty, knowing they come with a piece offering and all you have in return is a small smile and a "maybe I'll go next time". But, on the other, slightly less guilty hand, they're pretty much asking for it, aren't they? What's the price of faith for them? About enough bread product to feed 2 towers worth of faithless poor people. So not alot. And the price for us? Sacrificing one Sunday a week to return to the place where all the offerings came from to pay tribute to men long sinse dead still willing to save our horribly fucked up souls from the eternal damnation we oh so deserve. And this all revolves around a cookie. I ask again, what is the price of faith?

Over and over again. Or just plain over.

2010-01-23T12:43:00.001-08:00

I told you not to ride it too long.

2010-01-21T20:37:00.001-08:00

The Things In My Closet

2010-01-19T20:15:00.000-08:00

Ok, so, there's this song by the Red Hot Chili Peppers, its good. Like you know, because, beats and sounds and stuff in nice combination. But some of the first few beginning lyrics of the song are as follows:

Well I got a bad disease, Up from my brain is where I bleed. Insanity it seems, Is got me by my soul to squeeze.

As far as I know, there is no hole in my brain, and if its bleeding, I feel no different from when all liquids were in tact. So why, though no problem lay in the range of visibility, am I able to relate to the last part so well? While I'm probably (like really, really fucken no doubt probably) taking those few lyrics out of context to fit me, I still find some sort of coolness in the idea of a song with a description so strange I can still be happy with. Either way, by the laws of Newton, that reaction of cool is greeted with a opposite reaction of.... uncool? Yea, that'll work. Because, by some miracle (miracle?) of nature, I always feel like Insanity It Seems. From an intellectual stand point (I can see my... a house from here!....), I enjoy the way my screwed up head works. Who else is this angry but somehow strangely optimistic about being broke? And I'm pretty sure discovering your point of origin was a side of a high way, taken from your wolf parents would be pretty distressing to most. That being said/sung/whispered, I still wish I could smash my head into the nearest concrete wall so many times my "intellectual" mind would just quit working. This, is a thought that I, C Tripper (earned that one tonight), enjoy the means of keeping to myself. Except for tonight. I did it again. I answered my phone. To a good friend. And forgot how the mechanics of conversation work all together. I admit that being slightly lit, and having a parental figure in the room every other and a half minute contributed to the weirdness, but it wasnt my mother who mentioned the boredem of wandering my shared room and the discoveries I bravely made in my/our closet. Found a monkey by the way. Stuffed. Totally cool right? Well as much as yu think so, I'm not sure how smart that really was. Either way, through every odd, socially awkward encounter to come, I hope to learn from these mistakes, and go mute quicker. Or have one of those media moments where classic rock plays and the dude (me{played by quinten tarintino[did I spell that right?]}) has a sudden realization of the courage he has in him and suddenly has a great outlook on life. Hallmark, here I come.

Always {slightly} Insanely Yours,

Charlie Foxtrot, Cordtripper, Dawg

PSA: Song is Soul to Squeeze. Check it out.

The Secret(ive) Life of a (not very patriotic but) American (and possibly socially clueless) Teenager

2010-01-19T15:38:00.000-08:00

Ok, as mentioned previously, I need to post more. If you agree, say Aye. Against say Nay. Ok... 3 Ayes and 1 and a half Nays. If you don't count that cough. Either way, posting means rantings, fueled by ideas, fueled by personal experience, served with a side of coffee. And today's idea was brought to you by the letter awkward. Now while I don't have a fancy street set and a puppet of the word awkward with big, google eyes that move around as if haunted by a rag doll, I do have a personal account of the events that took place between the 4th and 6th period today at the learning institution of Rio Americana High School. Actually, as dramatic as I, the best story teller person make it sound, it was just a conversation. Kind of. One I started. And watched in terror at as it was shot down with a 44. caliber verbal rejection. I made a comment, followed it up, and continued to stare into the nothingness of the class room as the people on either side of me conversed without the slightest regard of my smoldering, air-wrecked comments, burning on the desks. Not that I blame them. As the title suggests in some way or another, the things I think about the things I should think about, well that and the things I think about other things, I keep from just about mostly 6 periods worth of teenagers. My secret life. Only I don't have a show on an oh so fine broadcasting community where the only words flying at 2 miles an hours through these "teens" minds are sex, tests, and pregnancy. Sometimes love finds its way in there but is then stabbed in the back by just friends. A bitter rivalry. Not that I know for sure, I only assume by the awe inspiring ads full of deceit and hugs. Either way, in a round aboutness, their conversation ended up on how awkward it is for a substitute teacher to teach sex ed.
"Um... yes... you..."
"My name's Mike"
"Oh.... Mike... what did you need to know...?"
"Your bra size Miss Jones"
"That isn't really..."
"This is sex ed!!!!!"
(insert teenage chanting demanding size)

Not that I expect much of that. Just half of it. And I apologize for the lack of intelligence in it. My only excuse is a lack of coffee, or virgin blood. Either way, it all goes back to that google eyed puppet word of today: awkward. Some how I sympathize with the unfortunate Miss Jones. Except for that fact she doesn't exist, and that I don't think my crashed comments had any bra sized bits in the carnage.

Not quite Daily but close, although probably eventually Weekly song suggestion:
Psychosocial :: Slipknot

Liar, liar, pantelones de fuego

2010-01-18T17:00:00.000-08:00

It might be "al fuego", dont remember for sure, but either way, its my shameful battle cry directed at the people who imaginary or not, may read this blog of mine. I lied. Im sorry (insert name here, with apologetic overtone), I lied about posting, but recent things.... ok, so spanned out over months, not super recent, but in combination, these things, make me want to post for reasons I myself, am not sure of. So I apologize, and also send greetings. Hello (name again), it's been a while, whats up? Really? Thats swell. Yea. Uh-huh. Me? I've officially met the love of my life. She lives here.

Me---------------5 hours and 2--------------->Her
Sacremento------pit stops later--------------->Salinas

See the delema here? Yes, it is that I used, and then miscorrectly spelled delema. The other one is that, through many a conversation, I've fallen for her, and through more-er conversation, she hinted at... "liking"? me. So who knows if the feelings mutual, but me being 16, 17 on the 8th day of the 3rd month, entitles me to obtain a drivers ok card. It does not, however, entitle me to just walk in to a building, sing a song in the tune of disney, walk out with a license shining in my hand, wish apon a star, and drive a gleaming van to my old town of Hellhole, USA. (Greenfield, CA, 30 mins from Salinas). Dont get me wrong, I miss hellhole, alot, like this much. *Spreads arms*. Sarcasm aside, I want to get back, but as I said, singing of the gleaming stars and dirtball town of my home does not reward me a way. It doesnt even find me a school for learning, let alone the cash for the school for the learning.

So, while many a times in this blog I have spoken of love, seeing as how they turned out sucked, dont ride on this one for long. I mean, this girl, shes different. Most people say "I have a feeling, I know it in my gut". Truth be told, the only thing I feel in my gut is hunger on occasion, and sick on rarer an occasion. But, I can also say that, of all these girls I've bragged to the internet about (bragged to the internet? Ha, Im a dork){Shut up, yur the dork}, this girl is the most intelligent, charming, cute, funny, and all around mysterious of them all. So while love is love, just an emotion I can die (unhappily) without, I still entertain the idea that she is in fact, the one I love. of course, I am a love cynic. So fuck love. I still love her though. But fuck love. Anyway, all ranting put on hold, I will be back on more and more recently with more and more mindless ranting for my and yur self satisfaction, well, if yu exsist. As I mentioned, this is not a Opra worthy blog apparently. Still, if yu do, grazie. I will be back. Only these new rants will be more sarcastic, and less whiney, while still expressing the same views. Believe me, we have the technology.

With All Due Respect,
Charlie Foxtrot, Dawg, and (insert a name of yur choice here. I like Nicolai.)

Titleless

2009-11-10T21:01:00.000-08:00

Heyo, well, sorry, havnt really posted in a while, do to clouded ideas and a lack of motivation. maybe its a lack of sartonin. or however yu spell it. dunno, but either way, hi, I'll post somthin about opinion tomorrow. thanks for reading if yu do. by.

Survival of Not Only the Fittest but Possibly Cruel and Corrupt and Own a Gun if they had Extra Money that Day

2009-09-27T16:32:00.000-07:00

Yea.... I think I possibly spelled survival wrong... doesnt look right... maybe its just me. Either way, todays topic: Society! Insert wild applause here. Ok, settle down. I was reading a manga today. Deadman Wonderland. Check it out if you like actiony, slightly romantic, criminally insane manga with supernatural aspects. But yea, well, in the manga there are public deathmatches, that are brodcasted throughout Japan. And I realized, as a whole, as a society, as a human race, we're actually not far off from that.While the fact exsists that we don't watch public deathmatches now adays, it's also true that watching one was completely normal in Roman times. Now, while thats not completely relevant, lets drop the stiff, historian view-point. Look around you on a daily basis (probly spelled that wrong to), and wat the hell do you see? Crime rates are on the rise, and the corruption in not only daily life, but in the gonvernment, are not really helping. This, is not really a government conspiracy idea. This is the things Im notcing increasingly often. Watching the news today, its full of tragedy. Thats not the point. The point is, that these tragedys are in repetition, the same crimes repeated over and over again, while new, somwhat twisted crimes seem to rise up on occasion, becoming part of the repetition cycle. Now, while I may be a teenage boy/man (I guess I have to be labled inbetween now) who may not understand all aspects of life, I do understand that looking at the way people of the world enjoy violence, whether its just watching or participating, that theres somthing wrong. I enjoy the next action blockbuster as much as the next person, but wen that blockbuster is becoming a (mainly American right now) lifestyle, then its time for a reavaluation of the way we run things. I feel no need to get into the issue of war right now, but wanna say that its funny, how the human race started and was written in history with war. Now its all ending in war. The rise and fall of man is just plain ironic.

Life, in general

2009-09-21T16:32:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I know I havnt posted much in a while, but then again, I dont think many people read these, if any. If somhow this ends up on blogs of note, then maybe I'll get a few glances, but we cant all get everything we want, now can we? All that pushed aside, Ive been kinda busy with life, which is somhow not getting worse, like I predictated. Its not getting tons better, but hey, I wont complain. It is a bit better, due to the girl I met. And the fact that I have alot more time for writing recently. One of my friends requests me to write her short stories cuz she really likes them, so I might post a few one here. But im workin on a bigger project for writing, so as I write and edit, I might post chapters on here. Im also currently working on a radio project, because I had to stay with my sister for a year and 3 quarters or 2 years, somwhere around there. thats where alot of my maturing and friend finding went on, and who knows how much money was used to put an extra plate at the table and to drive me across the towns. So im greatful. So im making her a CD, its gonna be a personallized radio show called the Happy Hour. Complete with DJ (me), comercials (me, and some friends), and music (various artists). so if anyone would like to help in som way, maybe create a comercial, or somthin along those lines. news segment or somthin maybe, I dunno, but if yu wanna, contact me, and we'll work somthing out. note that all credit will be given to yu for yur segments. I might send it in to the radio station here for the hell of it, so yu might be heard on 98 rock in sacremento, so yea, that to. anyway, thats my update for yu if yu excist, so yea, there ya go. contact information:

email: pakatari009@yahoo.com
myspace: www.myspace.com/notentirelycrazy

Educating the Youth

2009-08-28T14:15:00.000-07:00

Ok, where am I now? I'm sittin at the district office, where my parental figures are fillin out that oh so fun paper work to get me into a school. How long have I been here? Well..... like... an hour and 45 minutes.... yea, that sounds about right. For som reason, I guess I missed the memo as to why, we need 3 sourses of... proof? Proof that we live here. We moved here about a week ago. So how many sources do we hav now? 1. Yea, 1. The other 1, we got over the internet, hence, me writing this blog. The other peice of work took about half an hour to obtain, because the place we need to get it from, smud or somthin like that, wont fax it to us. Why..... yur guess is probly just about as good as mine. So here we sat for like another 10 minutes until one of the desk people got the idea to call them and ask herself. And thats all it took. Bravo, nameless education lady, bravo. Personally, its good to know that our education, and the education of the many other youths here, is so hassle free to take care of, isnt it? Sorry... yu'll have to excuse the sarcasm, and the rich-person accent, but right now, Im bored as hell. Like really freaken bored. And thats about it. Yea, thats all. Thanx for listenin. How bout yu? Anything new happenin in yur daily life? Yea? Sounds fun. No, Im serious.

Fire Safety

2009-08-24T15:26:00.000-07:00

Ok, so for the last 75% of the summer, Ive been staying with my sister at her place. All my friends and oppertunitys lie in this town. But my family is in the town 5 hours away. Tomarow, my parents are coming by to fetch me, and bring me back down to that town, where I start school on a campus Ive never even seen before the next day. Fucking fun, eh? Not only am I gonna be wanderin around the damn school, lost as a blindman in new york, Im also gonna hav to rekindle my lifes fire, and start somthing up again. Now that Ive lived here for more than 2 years (a new personal record), Ive become al little attached, and hav a personal fire goin with everyone I know. Everyday, I hav som kind of simple plan, and every saturday is the show, so its the best secetion of my life so far. Walking around the entire town, goin to an almost bankrupt store, getting a job at a gas station/convinient store, seein my tiny group of die-hard friends almost everyday, its the kind of life I want for the rest of my high school career. Im usually up for tryen new things, but this time....? Either way, the choice isnt mine, so it looks like Im being pulled out of the fire, and thrown into an ocean of fucking strange faces and cluelessness. Cheers.

Career Day

2009-08-22T01:11:00.000-07:00

Ok, so, when we were like 6, or 7, or 5 and a half, we all had like a future job in mind, right? Astronuat, Cowboy, Tyranisuarus Rex, Rockstar, all that stuff. Well, when I was yew high, I wanted to be a radio DJ. Now, Im all grown up, and my future job? DJ friends, DJ. I mean, comon, sittin in a studio, ranting about yur personally beliefs, talkin to callers from all over the city, and to top it off, playin great music every fucken day. Who wouldnt wanna try that once. But wait, theres more! Yu get paid for it!! I know, extraordinary, right? If anyone let me do that, let alone pay me for it, would honestly stare at that person, and ask them who the hell is in love with me and what sort of ultimate good deed did I do to deserve it. And then do it, of course. There is no more satisfying way to leave work then to say bye in yur own signature way to the hundreds of people listenin to yu play them music for theyre listenin pleasure. No way. Unless yur like a superhero or somthin I guess. Or in a band, actually creating all that music. Thats pretty cool to.... fucken showoffs....

Paying Attention

2009-08-16T22:56:00.000-07:00

Bein a writer at the age of sixteen, Im probly not that knowledgable about how the writing world works. But having had to write countless, numbingly boring papers on whatever our teacher happened to decide would be good for us to know, I do realize that writing takes time. But taking about an hour and a half to type an essay? Im not the only one who sees a problem with that, right? For som reason, probly phycological, I cant seem to keep focus on very much, because theres always som kind of destraction. If I was put in a completely white room, and told to watch a 70s spy movie, I'd probly end up counting the dirt spots and discolorations on the wall. Classy, eh? I do get things done, like chores, house work, jobs, I can do imediatly, cause I like to do work for som other reason, also probly phycological. But things like writing assignments, stuff in that nature, I can focus enough attention on to do in reasonable time. So if anyone is sellin meds for focus, pretend to contact me, and if I can remember why I was on the internet in the first place, I see what we can do.

Relijulous

2009-08-16T22:36:00.000-07:00

Yu may hav guessed, or maybe not, cause I really dont know how obvious it is, but Im not religious. In fact, I hate the idea of religion. Not to put myself in the spot light or anything, in fact, this post is just flaws I found in religion, not my opinion. For the kick off, we'll start with the corruption. Religion is seen as a beacon, a ray of light, leading us away from all that is evil and wrong, right? Then why is it that thoughout history, religious influences hav ben just as corrupt and unfaithful as the rest of us? Also, other than a gun, religion is one of the most influencial forces on earth, so there is no way anyone can say that its never been used as a tool of power at any point over its exsistence. In addition, its kind of saddens me that most people with religion are closed minded about most everything else. They believe in almighty gods/god who lives in an unseen place, and has an almighty power over the world and its people, but if I say I saw a spirit or ghost or somthing of that nature, Im the one considered crazy. Am I the only one who doesnt see how that works? Last, the way I see faith is the like russian roullete. Say theres six religions. Thats six people, and they all hav a gun to their head. All the triggers are pulled at the same time, and one man is left standing. Now, no matter how much faith and hope the other five people put into their guns, it didnt stop them from bein screwed in the end. And, thats my opinion.

Wearing the Cuffs

2009-08-07T22:51:00.000-07:00

Right now Im waiting for the next episode of redvsblue to load, so this is kinda a screw around post. Lets talk about thievery. Personally, Im not a great person I guess when it comes to morals, but I understand that there are rules. Like when it comes to stealing, I dont care about a drink or bag of candy for my frends from a huge chain store like wal-mart or rite-aid. But I do understand that taking personal belongings or money from people is just not cool. No matter how bad somone thinks I am, especially one person in paticualar, I could always be worse. Im a person who wants an occasional free drink or to get a broke frend somthing even if we're both broke. At least im not a petty thief stealing and reselling tvs, takin stuff from purses and robbing convinient stores. I could always be worse, but I choose not to, so judge me if yu feel the need, but know that personally, Im still here living my life out the way I see fit even if yu think of me lower then everyone else. I am a coward, a part-time thief, a neutral party, and an afterdark street walker. But thats not all I am, so dont pretend that all I am is the scum police shoot at on the street. Thanx, thats about it.

Pump it, louder.

2009-08-07T21:48:00.000-07:00

Lets talk about things other then my so called life now, eh? Ok, first subject..... music, just because its the only thing coursing through my vains at this moment. Music, even better then coffee and motor oil, its the only thing keeping me from giving up and becoming detatched from life somtimes. It has the ability to take control of emotion, well for me at the least, but either way, its completely..... sorry, slight distraction. Anyway, I dunno how many people are part of the group Im with, the group who go's nowhere unless they hav a music source, the people on the bus or in class that hav their music turned up too loud for their own good, but those people, which there are not many of, are the perfect examples of the cult of fuck it, if that cult existed. We can take any situation, or almost any, and just fuck it at the turn of the volume dial. Cranking, almost better then drugs. Or it is better, depending on yur drug policy. Ive never drugged before, so I cant make that comparison yet, but either way, if yu find the right song, or songs, or cd, or mix tape, yu can fix all yur problems until yur ready to actually deal with them. In the game of life, we put on our head phones, look the world in the face, and whisper "fuck yu". Then we clench our fists, crank the volume, and scream. Cheers mates.

A Few Recomendations:
Sugar; System of a Down
I'm Not Over; Carolina Liar
Things That Rhyme with Orange; I Set My Friends On Fire
Animals; Nickleback
Why Don't You Get a Job; The Offspring
All that falls Around Us; The Autumn Offering

Panic Constent

2009-08-02T21:13:00.000-07:00

Or panic constently. I dont know why, nor do I care enough to ask a medical proffesional I guess, but for some reason, whenever I have extra time to think, or when Im alone for mild periods of time, I get paranoid, and a little panic-ish. Like I'll look down at my phone, thinking "why hasnt anyone texted me? wheres my girl? whats she doen? who with? wheres my best frend? did he get busted for somthin? does he still like me? is my brother ok? wheres the coffee?!?"........ ok, the coffee thing is a lie, its always within my reach, maybe I should chill on it a bit, and Im trying, but its still not helping the panic disorder. When I have time to myself, all these things flood out of me, controlling my mood, aka, emotion. On the outside, like most the times with my frends, or most the time on this blog and things like that, I may seem immature I guess. But on the inside, I am thinking alot of mature and/or/possibly intellectual thoughts. Why? Dunno. But theyre not yur typical 16 year old boy "I want to screw, drink, and smoke while its illegal, and get my faced cleared up with that infomorcial zit creme" thoughts. Such paniced and deep thinking tends to lead to alot of inner conflict, a constant raging war. And wen yur brain is the battle field, a tank tends to be messy. Regardless, I am not ungreatful for my life. If it never happend the way it did, I wouldnt be the paniced teen talking to *insert the names of anyone who reads these if anyone does here* over the internet. And hey, at least Im not completely insane. Leave it on a high note of optimism for all yu good little blogger boys and girls. A treat for yu, enjoy it my frends.

Right And Wrong

2009-08-01T22:51:00.000-07:00

Today a friend asked me if I thought he did the right thing in his choice. Wat did I tell him? I told him that if he and the people revolving in his choice are happy, then, apparently, it was the right choice. I personally dont believe in right and wrong, because wats good for some is bad for others. Choices we make are based off the morals we strongly believe in. Some things, such as killing or raping, are wrong by default in the sense that it causes physical and mental pain, which is bad, even if the morals by which yu did the deed by seem right, its still causing pain. Killing out of revenge is, in my beliefs, only acceptable if the person in question as killed. Eye for an eye. But back to the main point, that smaller things, like leaving one girl for another, quiting a job for a small reason, stealing drinks from huge chain stores like wal-mart, and the like can not simply be labled right or wrong, because reasons vary. Leaving one girl who yu do not feel strong feelings for to be with somone yu love makes the majority happy, and talking to the other girl, can make her happy to possibly. But leaving a girl for one with bigger boobs is probly not a good judgement call. Choices can not be labled right or wrong based on circumstance, but based on the feelings the choice affects directly. Right and wrong exsists in the moral judgement of people, not an unspoken law of religion or parents or authoritive figures. Or so says me, but hey, Im a 16 year old with a blog, Im probly not yur best choice for judgement calls.

Is it me?

2009-07-30T12:11:00.000-07:00

Thats also a song. By midtown. But its metaphoric or however yu put it, its just a realization. 6 months ago, I was Corey. Quiet, loner, dark, not alota friends, always kinda bored, never showing my creativity Corey. Now, Im Corey. The same Corey that threw three empty bottles over a fence so that they were never found, the same one that smokes occasionally, the same one that is walking across town everyday to my frends to hang and screw around all day. And ask me about sitting in a four foot deep pool, naked, with my tounge in a mouth other then mine, and then the mosh on saturday......... confused? Really? Be honest. Yu are? Good. So am I. How the hell did these things happen? No, better question. How was I there wen these things happend?! I dont want to complain, Im just extremely numb in the brain as to how these things occured in the life and times of Corey. Maybe I should make a movie to watch over and over until I finally get to a part where I quickly pause it and yell "Thats where!!! Thats where I wasnt Corey, but I was Corey!!!" .... If I do, I need cowriters, actors, movie effect specialists, people to click down those little black and write boreds while somone who thinks hes better then everyone on set yells action. And we need a band for music. A good band. Yu know, for those moments when only sound works for what yu wanna say. And the credits. Which also means I need somone who can make memorable credits. Anyone interested?

The Future

2009-07-30T12:03:00.000-07:00

The future freaks me out. Which is a good song by motion city soundtrack. But its also my personal belief. Now, my biggest problems are finding a job and figuring out where Im going to live for the school year. But what about later, I mean, finding a job? Not easy. Finding a house? Damit. Keeping my girlfrend? A challenge. Keeping a wife and possibly a daughter or son? The cause of internal conflict. Really, planning ahead is somthing Im not Grade-A material with, but I think I should raise it to a Grade-B or C if I wanna survive this without finishing off my already clinicly started insanity. Any ideas?....... Me neither.

Introduction

2009-07-22T12:14:00.000-07:00

This is my introduction. Its not much, just figured it made sense if this was the first thing I posted. Theres not much to say, Im a 16 year old livin in a really small town, with not alot to do, so I write alot, which leads to blogging, which I did on myspace, til I realized nobody reads them there, so I decided to try the alternitive: a blog site. Hello alternitive, prepare for a ridiculous amout of completely useless information on an almost daily basess.... if thats how yu spell that.